Bisexuality is a sexual orientation in which a person is attracted to both men and women. Bisexual individuals may experience attraction to people of their own gender as well as to people of a different gender. It is important to note that bisexuality is not the same as being attracted to only two genders, as some individuals may be attracted to non-binary or genderqueer individuals as well.
Bisexuality can be an important aspect of an individual's identity, but it is also important to recognize that everyone's experiences and feelings are unique. If you are questioning your own sexuality, it may be helpful to speak with a therapist or counselor who specializes in working with LGBTQ+ individuals.
There are many resources available for individuals who identify as bisexual or who are interested in learning more about bisexuality. Here are a few:
The Bisexual Resource Center: This organization provides information, support, and advocacy for the bisexual community. Their website offers a range of resources, including information on coming out, finding community, and dealing with discrimination.
The Human Rights Campaign: This organization advocates for LGBTQ+ rights and provides resources and support for individuals across the spectrum of sexual orientations and gender identities. They offer a number of resources specifically for bisexual individuals.
GLAAD: This organization works to promote understanding and acceptance of LGBTQ+ individuals in the media and beyond. They offer a range of resources on bisexuality, including information on representation and allyship.
Remember that everyone's experiences with bisexuality are unique, and it's important to be respectful and supportive of individuals regardless of their sexual orientation. If you have further questions or concerns, don't hesitate to seek out resources and support.
I get the imposter syndrome. I remind myself that being queer means that I'm attracted to more than just the opposite gender, whether I've actually had relationships with people who aren't straight cis men. Most people don't tell kids or young adults that they can't possibly be straight if they can't show the receipts of all the heterosexual relationships they've had. Why does anyone ask the same of a gay, lesbian, bi, or pan person? What you feel in your heart, mind, and body is what's true.
It appears that the newer generations are using gay as an umbrella term. While understandable, it does erase some significant struggles of bisexuals. I don’t care for it.
BHAM in March did a number of posts a couple years ago showing stats on Bi and mental health struggles, and Bi men, in particular, are significantly affected by the either or attitudes of many. Being understood as a Bi man is difficult when the Straight community ignores us as we get lumped into the gay community and a few other tropes.
Can someone explain to me if I should identify as queer or bisexual or bi curious? I love women, don’t check out guys, yet love watching gay porn and have a strong fantasy to suck some co&k and would love to be a bottom with another man, I’ve used dildos on myself and my wife peggs me. However like I said I am not the slightest attracted to men. What am I?
I came out in 1984 as bi. I have referred to myself as queer, but never gay or lesbian because that's not what I am. I'm technically pan so if someone asks I tell them I like everyone. I hate that we have to have labels, but I agree that using a term of something you aren't could be detrimental. In my experience, bi men have a much harder time, and a lot of times from our own community.
I think bisexuality is misunderstood. Im a 47 year old cis woman who finally had the courage to come out as Bi. I'm not having an easy time "explaining" my feelings to my husband (straight cis man) or queer acquaintances (my real friends, get it). It doesn't make sense to some people.
Married to my wife for 10 years. Had three kids, around year 8 I came out as Bi. She said I have to pick a side and need counseling communication. Now she won’t fix us and swears I have to be gay.
Sunday after thanksgiving my husband and best friend left us for his gf husband and 2 kids. I need good thoughts. I’m 40/2 kids at home one grown/ I’m bi and live in wv. Always willing to meet new friends.
my husband is a cis white male. I'm Bi and Demi. he's very understanding and is fine with me exploring the female side of bisexuality but I find it really hard to make LGBTQ+ friends. My parents still don't know about me being Bi so I can't dress Bi and I think everyone thinks I'm straight
Yes, Tine, it’s so tough! I’m 34 and in the midst of coming out. I’m really fortunate that my community is super progressive/supportive. The bigger coming out for me is that I’m in a triad and not just that I’m bi. we don’t feel safe to tell everyone. Those we have come out to and are supportive remind us that those who judge us probably aren’t our real friends. Which is hard. But I completely agree with telling people when/if you’re ready. It’s your journey!
I agree with everything you said except the labels part. Labels are important to form communities and to easily express how one is. But yes using the wrong label is detrimental. I just came across 4 guys on this app who had both gay an bi/pan tags on their profiles. It’s ridiculous, it’s almost like they’ve never seen dictionary definitions of gay and bi. One cannot be both by definition.
I feel you. I knew when I was 18 and thought I would live my life with my ex and grow old with him. Then I would live my life as bi after he died. Then my spectrum changed. I started liking effeminate men or women more than manly looking men. Then I became hyper sexual and he turned asexual which is a totally different story
I say bi. Because to me, pan means gender is irrelevant in my attractions. I do not experience that. My attractions towards men and women feel different. Additionally, I have not experienced attraction towards a nonbinary person (not saying it’s impossible, it’s just never happened yet). If I ended up feeling attraction to an enby person, I might switch to pan. But right now, it’s just men and women. (To clarify further:
I am attracted to both trans and cis people).
Yeah I experience that too. Coming from a small country town, most people are homophobic and the ones that are “forced” not to be because they are gay themselves are also hateful towards bi people because they just hate straight people for being homophobic and don’t want to be close to anything like it. So both communities dislike the other to the point that bisexuals have nowhere to go. It kinda sucks.
I’m bi and I technically could be considered pan because I’m attracted to all genders too. I identify as bi cause unlike pan people my attraction is gender-specific and not regardless of gender. I have a huge preference for women and non-binary people, and tbh I don’t see myself dating a man. I’m only attracted to fictional ones 😂
Jill- we opened our marriage eight years ago ( we have been together 25+ years). It takes a great deal of communication and commitment for us to make it work. It hasn’t been easy. I’ve read a lot of books (Opening Up and Polysecure are two that come to mind), listened to a lot of podcasts (Savage Love by Dan Savage was what gave us even the beginning of ability to think about it). My husband is also bi so I could understand how this offered us the chance to be more authentically ourselves.
hi, I go with bisexual. I could use pansexual also, but I stick with bisexual because I think it's a broader term that can be used more frequently than pan. if I say bisexual, people get the idea that I'm attracted to more than one gender (and that's the message I like to get across). with pan I believe people don't yet understand, or there are many different meanings to what pan and bi are. in my experience Bi is more understandable for people, specially older
I don’t understand why. I myself am a Gen Zer yet I understand that the clear undisputed definition of being gay is that one is only attracted to the same sex. Why do you think some younger people are being so problematic? In my opinion bi-erasure not only negatively impacts the bi community but it also negatively impacts the gay community as well since these people who call themselves gay but are actually bi go around spreading false ideas as to what being gay is thus making gays feel further ostracized/ isolated.
You’ve got to find what works for you both. My husband and I are both bi and we opened up our marriage eight years ago. Over the years I’ve just found out I don’t like to share details- really very little at all. We tell each other when we will be out and about when we will get home. We’ve spent a lot of time building trust and communication skills so that our relationship is better. It’s hard work
And setting up Bi guys as liars to their partners… when I came out to my wife she learned from wherever that I must be gay and lying to her, along with all the other tropes and myths around bi men.
Most people around my age don’t see queer as a slur that’s why it baffles me that so many young bi men call themselves gay. Also if a bi person want to call themselves something but doesn’t like the term queer then why don’t they just call themselves bi instead of saying they are bi and gay?
Hello! So, I’m non-binary, and just wanted to let you know that bisexuality isn’t exclusionary of any gender identity! Bi simply means attraction to genders like and unlike one’s own, so if that’s what you experience, the bisexual label can be for you. 🥰
It true that queer is more widely used and queer isn’t limited to meaning gay; however, there are still many young people and people in general who call themselves gay when they are not. Literally just the other day I found at least 2 bodybuilders on Instagram who call themselves gay yet they also themselves bi on some posts.
I have a newly bi married man that I have been playing with. His wife knows all about it and watches us when we play. So far the only rule that we have is no kissing what so ever. It’s still new to both of us, but it is fun.
My wife knows but we don’t talk about it because she has her own GF that I don’t ask about.
Wow, Tim I’m so sorry to hear this, must be really hard to have your mum say that to you.
Being bi/pan is some times difficult for people to understand. I think some people have only just got their heads around people being gay or lesbian-being bi or pan just doesn’t compute
I’m going celebrate my friend getting a new job with our coworkers. They don’t know I’m bisexual though. When I want to explore my bi side I love drag shows at the local LGBTQ+ bar 🥰. I’m taking baby steps coming out. Mainly because I’m not sure yet what label is best for me. Bi fits best for now 💙💜💖
Hi, I am bisexual, possibly pan? I’m still trying to figure out where I stand, all I know is I’m attracted to girls and guys. I’ve told my friends, but I’m anxious to tell my mom. I know she’ll be supportive but it’s hard because I feel as though she will look at me differently. I guess what I’m asking is if y’all have any advice?
Exactly! I don’t understand why some bi men continue to insist on calling themselves gay when a more inclusive term like queer exists!
I believe that many bi men who call themselves gay are bi men who prefer men. There should be new terms that they can use so they can feel more comfortable. Such as bi-male oriented. Bi-female oriented. And so on.
As a 34y/o who recently (within the past few years) just realized/accepted being bi/pan, I feel weird using queer. It was always used as a pretty major slur growing up and I can’t shake the “sound” of that word. Lol.
I agree!! I recently came out to my brother and best friend who both are bi as well. My parents are extremely conservative so it’s great to have a place where one can feel 100% comfortable
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